Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Randomize