STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
