I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
