What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Text me some of your sweat
Randomize
