I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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