the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
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