Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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