The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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