He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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