I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
