i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Randomize
