We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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