Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
