Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Randomize
