You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Randomize
