Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Randomize
