You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Moan for me like Helen Keller
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize