oh god the rape fog is back!
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Randomize
