and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize
