Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize