something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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