you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize