I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
