do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
