I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
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