I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
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