HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
