I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
smell my finger.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize