MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
the raccoons are back...
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