I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize
