3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
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