A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Randomize
