i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
