my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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