You're completely useless in the revolution.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I can't turn off my feet"
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
Randomize