Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Randomize
