You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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