shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
