none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
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