I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
