Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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