the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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