my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
