I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Randomize
