He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize