I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
