i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I have feelings that need drinking.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I'm like, not good at living.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Randomize
