biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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