I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
our cab driver is having phone sex.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I'm just crazy horny about you
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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