the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
