Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize
