I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize